Valentine’s Day word problems

Writing for The New Yorker, Tom Batten has come up with some Valentine’s Day themed math word problems.

3. A local pizzeria is offering one large pizza for eleven dollars and seventy-five cents on Valentine’s Day. If you have forty-six dollars in your checking account, it takes you twenty-five minutes to eat a large pizza all by yourself, and your only plan for the evening is to spend ninety minutes scrolling through the Instagram account of a woman you had a crush on in high school for clues that her marriage might be faltering, how did it come to this?

See also how to decipher what’s inside each chocolate in a box of chocolates.

• holidays
• Tom Batten